And the worst actor is...

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Tom Cruise may have survived a Martian attack in last year's remake of "War of the Worlds," but he has failed to elude Hollywood's movie police.
The actor was among the contenders announced on Monday for the annual Razzie Awards, which "honor" the worst achievements in film.
Cruise will compete for the year's worst actor award with Will Ferrell ("Bewitched," "Kicking & Screaming"), Jamie Kennedy ("Son of the Mask"), Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson ("Doom") and Rob Schneider ("Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo").
The nominees were announced by The Golden Raspberry Award Foundation, a tongue-in-cheek organization that claims more than 700 voting members.
Foundation head John Wilson said in an interview he did not think Cruise's portrayal of a working-class man in "War of the Worlds" was particularly credible.
While there were arguably worse performances, Cruise's off-screen antics, either in support of Scientology, or in the throes of passion with new girlfriend Katie Holmes, ensured he made the grade, Wilson said.
Indeed, Cruise was nominated twice in the new category of most tiresome tabloid target, which salutes "the celebs we're all sick and tired of," Wilson said.
Cruise is already a Razzie winner, sharing the honor with Brad Pitt for worst screen couple in "Interview with the Vampire." He was also nominated for the film "Cocktail."
Actresses Jenny McCarthy and Jessica Simpson also picked up three nominations. McCarthy was cited for worst actress, worst screen couple and worst screenplay for "Dirty Love." Simpson will also vie for worst screen couple, as well as worst supporting actress as Daisy Duke in "The Dukes of Hazard."
"Son of the Mask," a sequel to the 1994 Jim Carrey hit, led the nominated films with eight mentions. Unfortunately for the producers, Carrey did not reprise his role in the new film and no one went to see it.
"Dukes of Hazzard," which did well at the box office, received seven nominations.
Winners will be announced on March 4, the day before the
Academy Awards' Last year's announcement was attended by Halle Berry, graciously taking her lumps for "Catwoman."

list of films................ thanks to www.imdb.com

Mission: Impossible III (2006) (post-production) .... Ethan Hunt... aka M:I-3 (USA: promotional abbreviation)
War of the Worlds (2005) .... Ray Ferrier
Collateral (2004) .... Vincent
The Last Samurai (2003) .... Nathan Algren... aka The Last Samurai: Bushidou (USA: poster title)
Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002) .... Tom Cruise as Austin Powers... aka Austin Powers: Goldmember (USA)
Minority Report (2002) .... Chief John Anderton
Vanilla Sky (2001) .... David Aames
Mission: Impossible II (2000) .... Ethan Hunt... aka M:I-2 (USA: DVD box title (promotional abbreviation)) ... aka Mission: Impossible II (Germany)
Magnolia (1999) .... Frank T.J. Mackey... aka mag-no'li-a (USA: promotional title)
Eyes Wide Shut (1999) .... Dr. William 'Bill' Harford... aka EWS (USA: promotional abbreviation)
"3rd Rock from the Sun" ... aka 3rd Rock (USA: promotional abbreviation) ... aka Life As We Know It - Dick and the Other Guy (1998) TV Episode .... Guy on couch
"The Magic School Bus" ... aka Scholastic's The Magic School Bus (USA: complete title) - Goes Cell-ular (1997) TV Episode .... Show Host
Jerry Maguire (1996) .... Jerry Maguire
Mission: Impossible (1996) .... Ethan Hunt... aka Mission Impossible
Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles (1994) .... Lestat de Lioncourt... aka Interview with the Vampire (USA: short title)
The Firm (1993) .... Mitch McDeere
A Few Good Men (1992) .... Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Far and Away (1992) .... Joseph Donnelly
"The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson" ... aka The Best of Carson (USA: rerun title) - Episode dated 5 July 1990 (1990) TV Episode
Days of Thunder (1990) .... Cole Trickle
Born on the Fourth of July (1989) .... Ron Kovic
Rain Man (1988) .... Charlie Babbitt
Young Guns (1988) (uncredited) .... Cowboy
Cocktail (1988) .... Brian Flanagan
The Color of Money (1986) .... Vincent Lauria
Top Gun (1986) .... Lt. Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell
Legend (1985) .... Jack... aka Legend: Ultimate Edition (USA: reissue title (video title))
All the Right Moves (1983) .... Stefen Djordjevic... aka All Right
Risky Business (1983) .... Joel Goodsen
Losin' It (1983) .... Woody
The Outsiders (1983) .... Steve Randle
Taps (1981) .... David Shawn... aka The Siege at Bunker Hill: T.A.P.S (UK: TV title)
Endless Love (1981) .... Billy

AHL Standings as of 24 Jan 11:55 am

Eastern Conference
Rank	Atlantic Division	GP	W	L	OTL	SOL	PTS	PCT	GF	GA	STK	P10	PIM
1	Portland Pirates	44	27	11	3	3	60	0.682	166	147	0-2-0-0	5-3-0-2	1171
2	Manchester Monarchs	44	26	13	1	4	57	0.648	141	129	0-2-0-0	5-4-0-1	729
3	Hartford Wolf Pack	44	23	14	2	5	53	0.602	154	138	0-1-0-0	5-5-0-0	1059
4	Providence Bruins	42	23	17	1	1	48	0.571	128	109	1-0-0-0	6-4-0-0	848
5	Lowell Lock Monsters	46	17	21	4	4	42	0.457	127	150	1-0-1-0	4-3-3-0	920
6	Springfield Falcons	43	16	21	2	4	38	0.442	119	170	0-1-0-0	2-6-1-1	792
7	Albany River Rats	43	14	26	1	2	31	0.360	116	150	0-1-1-0	4-5-1-0	1210
Rank	East Division	GP	W	L	OTL	SOL	PTS	PCT	GF	GA	STK	P10	PIM
1	Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins	42	32	6	3	1	68	0.810	153	81	0-1-0-0	6-3-1-0	1191
2	Hershey Bears	45	26	10	2	7	61	0.678	153	131	2-0-0-1	5-3-0-2	1116
3	Norfolk Admirals	41	21	16	2	2	46	0.561	126	122	2-0-0-0	6-4-0-0	1040
4	Bridgeport Sound Tigers	45	21	20	2	2	46	0.511	139	142	2-0-0-0	7-2-0-1	887
5	Binghamton Senators	42	17	21	2	2	38	0.452	139	160	0-2-0-0	5-5-0-0	1267
6	Philadelphia Phantoms	44	17	23	0	4	38	0.432	96	125	2-0-0-1	3-6-0-1	1363
	Western Conference
Rank	North Division	GP	W	L	OTL	SOL	PTS	PCT	GF	GA	STK	P10	PIM
1	Grand Rapids Griffins	45	30	12	1	2	63	0.700	179	151	1-0-0-0	7-2-1-0	1032
2	Manitoba Moose	45	27	13	3	2	59	0.656	135	110	4-0-1-0	6-2-2-0	1109
3	Syracuse Crunch	43	25	15	2	1	53	0.616	144	139	2-0-0-0	6-4-0-0	1050
4	Toronto Marlies	44	23	18	3	0	49	0.557	146	137	1-0-0-0	6-2-2-0	1004
5	Rochester Americans	43	21	20	1	1	44	0.512	141	137	1-0-0-0	4-6-0-0	1055
6	Cleveland Barons	49	20	26	2	1	43	0.439	136	171	0-2-1-0	5-4-1-0	928
7	Hamilton Bulldogs	47	17	28	0	2	36	0.383	122	149	0-3-0-0	4-6-0-0	1143
Rank	West Division	GP	W	L	OTL	SOL	PTS	PCT	GF	GA	STK	P10	PIM
1	Houston Aeros	44	32	10	1	1	66	0.750	168	118	4-0-0-0	8-2-0-0	1020
2	Milwaukee Admirals	43	28	11	3	1	60	0.698	146	118	6-0-1-0	7-2-1-0	952
3	Peoria Rivermen	41	22	16	1	2	47	0.573	137	126	1-0-0-0	6-3-0-1	1022
4	Iowa Stars	42	21	19	1	1	44	0.524	115	118	1-0-0-0	4-6-0-0	872
5	Chicago Wolves	42	16	18	2	6	40	0.476	144	153	0-2-0-0	3-6-0-1	1134
6	Omaha Ak-Sar-Ben Knights	45	16	21	1	7	40	0.444	107	135	0-7-0-0	3-7-0-0	1089
7	San Antonio Rampage	42	12	27	1	2	27	0.321	75	136	0-3-0-1	1-7-1-1	936

Vampire for Governor

January 23, 2006 11:46 a.m. ET
Vampire politics (Willie Geist, Situation Senior Producer)
Jonathon Sharkey isn't the first politician to be accused of being an evil bloodsucker. He might, however, be the first to accuse himself of that. Better known to his base as "The Impaler", Sharkey is a self-proclaimed vampire, Satanist, and semi-professional wrestler. If he gets his way (and vampires typically do), he'll also be the next governor of Minnesota.
In a shrewd political maneuver clearly intended to raise his national profile for an inevitable third-party presidential run, Sharkey discussed his campaign platform with Tucker on "The Situation" this week. He proved himself to be not some wacko with fangs and a cape (well, he does have cape), but rather a common-sense vampire with real solutions for the real problems facing Minnesotans. Sure, some shortsighted voters will have trouble overlooking the fact that Sharkey feeds on human blood, but let's be real here, is that really the most disgusting thing a candidate for public office has ever done? Bill Clinton (allegedly) hooked up with Paula Jones, for God's sake. Now that's offensive.

• Voting for the Vampire?Thesituationss Tucker Carlson speaks to a real-life vampire running for Governor of Minnesota.
MSNBC
If you're a junkie for Minnesota politics like I am, you know the 2006 gubernatorial election will be decided by voters' answer to one central question: do you or do you not favor the public impalement of drug dealers, terrorists and other violent criminals? If you answered "yes" to what really amounts to a rhetorical question (what right-thinking person could oppose it?), then there is finally a candidate who speaks for you. Sharkey has pledged to bring a little taste of 15th Century Transylvania right there to The Land of 10,000 Lakes. Convicted criminals will be impaled in front of the statehouse. That's right, stakes will be driven through them. How's that for a law-and-order candidate?
When your governor has a name like "The Impaler", you can be pretty sure impalement is more than just another empty campaign promise. If, however, Sharkey runs into any unforeseen legal obstacles with the whole impaling business, he pledged on our show to send Sicilian crime families after the drug dealers. He might have some trouble locating Sicilian crime families in the greater Twin Cities area, but let's cross that bridge when we get to it.
As you laugh to yourself about the idea of a Satanist vampire sitting in the Minnesota governor's mansion, remember one thing: a professional wrestler nicknamed "The Body" kept that seat warm not too long ago. Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey has my formal endorsement. I'm getting on the bandwagon while there's still room.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10693414/#060123a

Cereal Killers?

Is sugar cereal pushed on kids?
Nickelodeon and the Kellogg Company may face charges regarding obesity
Are Count Chocula and the Lucky Charms leprechaun evil instruments of a vast conspiracy to make your children fat? Michael Jacobson thinks so.
Jacobson is executive director of the Center for Science in the Public Interest which plans to sue both Nickelodeon and the Kellogg company because it says they push sugar cereals on kids and thereby contribute to childhood obesity.
He joined 'The Situation’ to discuss why parents should not have to carry the full blame for the effects sugar cereal has on children.
Cereal Killers1/19: The Center For Science In The Public Interest plans to sue Nickelodeon and the Kellogg Company because it says they push sugar cereals on kids. The Situation's Tucker Carlson asks the group's Executive Director Michael Jacobson, why the group is holding a television network and cereal manufacturers responsible for what kids eat instead of the parents.
TUCKER CARLSON, HOST, 'SITUATION': So this is the breaking news you bring to America, cereal companies target children when they try to sell sugared cereals.
MICHAEL JACOBSON, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, CENTER FOR SCIENCE IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST: You have an interesting way of putting it.
The news is that food companies spend $10 billion a year, with sophisticated marketing techniques, going after 5-year-old kids. And we're saying that when they're pushing junky foods, unhealthy foods on little kids, 5-year-olds, that that, under state law, is unfair and deceptive. Deceptive to the kids, because they don't understand the difference between a program and an ad, and unfair to the parents, who don't need big companies interjecting themselves in what should be parental and family decisions.
CARLSON: Let me just say for the record that Lucky Charms is delicious and as far as I know packed with vitamins and minerals. At least the box says so.
But here's the point, and here's why your theory falls down, in my opinion. Kids don't buy cereal or anything else. Parents do. Parents are responsible for what their kids eat. And they have direct control over what their kids eat for breakfast. That's the whole point of being a parent, is to make sure your kids eat the right things. So why are you suing the cereal question or the television network, when it's parents?

Read Tucker Carlson's 'Untied' blog
'The Situation' homepage
JACOBSON: Parents certainly have a responsibility, but the advertising industry has something that it calls the nag factor. They know that if you can get a kid to nag their parents time after time after time after time, eventually the parent are going to break down.
But parents have a responsibility, and corporations have responsibilities, also. Such as not being deceptive and not engaging in deceptive and unfair marketing practices.
CARLSON: OK. So you're saying that children see these ads and they get so excited, they bother their parents until the parents buy the cereal. And the parents really have no choice, because the kids are so persistent? Is that what you're saying? Because if that's what you're saying, the parents who cave to that kind of pressure are bad parents.
JACOBSON: That's really a side point. Yes, parents have responsibility.
CARLSON: Kids don't buy cereal, so it's the point.
JACOBSON: The central point, Tucker, is this marketing practice unfair or deceptive. The American Psychologists Association believes it is. The Institute of Medicine has strongly criticized this kind of marketing, saying it's a direct threat to the health of young children.
CARLSON: OK. Here's what's really going on, is if there is a guilty party in this—and I'm just assuming you're right, that these cereals are actually bad. I found them delicious. I'm 6'1”. I grew up eating them. I've done I'm OK.
JACOBSON: It's not just cereal. It's hamburgers and French fries and all the garbage.
CARLSON: It's all good. But for the sake of argument, I'm going to agree with you that it's bad. It's still the parents' fault. And you don't want to sue the parent for two reasons. One, it would make it obvious that you're the bad guy. There goes Jacobson, suing parents again. Right? And two, parents don't have the money. And for the greedy trial lawyers to get a payoff, they can't sue parents. They've got to sue Kellogg's, right?
JACOBSON: Well, we've told Kellogg and Nickelodeon that if we could reach some agreement we're not going to ask for one dime from them before we go to court. And we hope they'll negotiate.
But it's so interesting to hear you, Mr. Conservative Values, not defending family values.
CARLSON: No, but I am defending.
JACOBSON: You seem to favor allowing industry to spend $10 billion a year to target innocent little kids. It's nuts.
CARLSON: First of all, I don't think you ought to let your kids watch the programs where that stuff is advertised. I don't let mine watch those programs, ever, and never have.
Two, we control what our kids eat. That's why we're parents. That's why we're not nannies, right? That's the difference. I'm for parents. That's why I think parents have the power to prevent their kids from eating garbage if they want to enforce that power.
Watch 'The Situation with Tucker Carlson' each weeknight at 11 p.m. ET
© 2006 MSNBC Interactive

Cranberry Juice

(HealthDayNews) -- Cranberry juice may taste tangy, but it holds sweet relief for women who regularly suffer from urinary tract infections (UTIs).
Drinking cranberry juice can help prevent UTIs in some women, according to an article in the May 15 issue of Clinical Infectious Diseases.
Sexually active adult women with recurring UTIs are the most likely to reap benefits from regular doses of cranberry juice. Researchers have noted up to a 50 percent drop in infection rates among that group.
Doctors know that cranberries contain two compounds that keep infection-causing bacteria from adhering to the lining of the urinary tract, and have been studying the positive benefits since 1966.
However, the studies have not tended to be uniform, making it hard to compare them.
"In general, we need more clinical studies with different population groups, different dosages, and comparison between juice and capsules," author Dr. Raul Raz of Haemek Medical Center in Afula, Israel, said in a prepared statement.
More information
Here's where you can learn more about urinary tract infections.

Winter blues.........

Never Been sure why they call it winter blues, when it is really a grey mood that your in. Sometimes when the pain gets to strong its hard to see if the lines are blurred, how to keep all my balls in the air without dropping any. I detest that I am unable to live a normal life, that when the pain is so real that I just want it to end, the ripping of my soul from me. The release would be great. I feel so different from people that sometimes the thought of not being here is easier then being different. The reality of not know what love is, the emotional nakedness of life sucks. When you put yourself out there and feel the cont'd knowledge that you will never measure up, to complete a task or be warm and caring.

Whiskey Lullaby.....................

She put him out like the burnin' end of a midnight cigarette

She broke his heart he spent his whole life tryin' to forget

We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time

But he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mindUntil the night

[1st Chorus]

He put that bottle to his head and pulled the triggerAnd finally drank away her memoryLife is short but this time it was biggerThan the strength he had to get up off his kneesWe found him with his face down in the pillowWith a note that said I'll love her till I dieAnd when we buried him beneath the willowThe angels sang a whiskey lullaby

(Sing lullaby)

The rumors flew but nobody knew how much she blamed herselfFor years and years she tried to hide the whiskey on her breathShe finally drank her pain away a little at a time But she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mindUntil the night

[2nd Chorus]

She put that bottle to her head and pulled the triggerAnd finally drank away his memoryLife is short but this time it was biggerThan the strength she had to get up off her kneesWe found her with her face down in the pillowClinging to his picture for dear lifeWe laid her next to him beneath the willowWhile the angels sang a whiskey lullaby

are u a serial killer?

http://quiz.myyearbook.com/zenhex/quiz.php?id=752

take the above quiz and find out

quizes....

this is brought to you from a good friend of mine,

i am ........Your Results:New England (MA ME VT RI NH CT)You are WICKED good, WICKED cold and you WICKED hate the yankees!!!

what are you?

http://quiz.myyearbook.com/zenhex/quiz.php?id=11187

take the monkish test

how monkish are you.........................

http://www.usanetwork.com/series/monk/monkish/

Guts or Balls ?

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition for each is listed below ....

• GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: "Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?"
• BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say: "You're next."

I hope this clears up any confusion on the subject.

Foot in mouth

A GUY GOES TO A SUPERMARKET AND NOTICES A BEAUTIFUL BLONDE WAVE AT HIM AND SAY'S HELLO.
HE'S RATHER TAKEN BACK, BECAUSE HE CAN'T PLACE WHERE HE KNOWS HER FROM, SO HE SAYS "DO YOU KNOW ME?"

TO WHICH SHE REPLIES

"YES, YOU'RE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS."
NOW HE THINKS BACK TO THE ONLY TIME HE HAS EVER BEEN UNFAITHFUL TO HIS WIFE AND SAYS,

"MY GOD, ARE YOU THE STRIPPER FROM MY BACHELOR PARTY THAT I LAID ON THE POOL TABLE WITH ALL MY BUDDIES WATCHING, WHILE YOUR PARTNER WHIPPED MY ASS WITH WET CELERY AND THEN STUCK A CARROT UP MY BUTT?".
SHE SAID "NO, I'M YOUR SONS MATH TEACHER."

Joke of the week

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It.
2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way, Unique Up On It.
3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? They Take The Psycho Path
4. How Do You Get Holy Water? You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall? Dam!
6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long? Polaroid's
7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work? A Stick
8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours? Nacho Cheese.
9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers? Subordinate Clauses.
10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? Quattro Sinko..
11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow? Spoiled Milk.
12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire? Frostbite.
13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches? A Nervous Wreck.
14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Anyone Can Roast Beef. Can you pea soup?
15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs? Right Where You Left Him.
16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? Because They Have Big Fingers.
17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive? Because It Scares The Dog.
18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic? Sanka.
19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover? The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down? Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver? A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang! A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same? Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer